How to Choose the Right Adoption Agency or Attorney

If you've considered all your pregnancy options and decided that adoption is the right choice for you and your baby, your next step is carefully selecting an adoption professional to work with. The right adoption agency and an attorney will make a significant difference in your adoption experience by providing expert guidance and ensuring you receive the help and support needed before, during, and after the adoption process.

Understand Different Types of Adoption Professionals

As you research adoption online, you’ll find many websites offering adoption services. However, not all “adoption professionals” are the same. Since many more families are hoping to adopt than there are babies available for adoption, there's a lot of competition for your attention on the internet.

The Good: There are many licensed and ethical adoption agencies and attorneys who can help you throughout the adoption process.

The Bad: Unlicensed facilitators or “baby brokers” are for-profit companies that primarily match expectant mothers with adoptive families in exchange for large matching fees. They often use online advertising to attract pregnant women. They are illegal in most states and should be avoided.

How can you distinguish between trustworthy adoption professionals and those you should avoid? First, you need to know which questions to ask. 

Key Questions to Ask Potential Adoption Professionals

Before deciding to work with any adoption professional, ask these important questions:  

This question may seem obvious, but it can be challenging to figure out an adoption professional's true identity, especially when looking online. Before you decide to work with anyone or complete their paperwork, you need to get some basic information such as their first and last name, location, and full name of their company or organization.

Determining the kind of "adoption professional" you're dealing with can be challenging. Adoption agency? Attorney? Unlicensed baby broker (sometimes called "marketer," "facilitator," or advertiser")? Unlicensed baby brokers are illegal in most states, but they’re still all over the internet, trolling for expectant mothers who are looking for help with adoption. When choosing an adoption professional, make sure they’re either a licensed adoption agency or an attorney licensed in your state. 

This is a particularly important issue when you’re speaking to an adoption lawyer. An expectant mother making an adoption plan should have her own lawyer (at no cost) from the beginning of the adoption process—not just at the end when she’s asked to sign paperwork. Adoption is a complicated legal process. Before you consent to an adoption, your attorney will ensure you are fully informed about your legal rights and responsibilities.

A word of caution: Don’t look for legal advice from the adoption agency social worker. As knowledgeable and caring as many adoption social workers are, they are not qualified or allowed to give legal advice. The adoption agency doesn’t represent you. 

The adoptive parents’ lawyer is also not the right person to give you legal advice since he or she is required to always put the adoptive parents' interests above yours. You need to have your own lawyer to guide you through the adoption process, represent your interests, and answer your questions in a confidential setting. 

This question is crucial because it will help you confirm whether you're talking to a trustworthy adoption agency, attorney, or an unlicensed baby broker. Since baby brokers are not legally allowed to provide adoption services, they only focus on matching you with a family who wants to adopt. So, what's the difference between providing adoption services and matching you with a family? A lot!

Here’s how it usually works: You search online for something like "giving baby up for adoption" or "how to put my baby up for adoption." You click on an ad or website link, read a few pages of the website, fill out the contact form, or call the number listed. Since most adoption websites look alike, you may not know you're contacting a baby broker instead of a licensed adoption agency or attorney.

The adoption broker asks you to fill out some paperwork and then sends you some profile books from families who are hoping to adopt. The profiles usually include several cute photos and describe the family, their jobs, where they live, what they like to do, and why they want to adopt.

The adoption broker then asks you to choose from one of the families. Once you do, she collects a hefty fee from the adoptive parents (usually between $15,000 and $25,000) and hands you off to others to complete the process.  

WARNING: This is not the way adoption is supposed to work! Finding an ethical and licensed adoption professional to help you from the beginning of the process is the only way to protect you and your child from being treated as a commodity. This kind of adoption professional will make sure you get the support you need and deserve, including options counseling, medical care, legal representation, a clear understanding of the kind of contact you’ll have with your child after the adoption, and support after the adoption.

You may feel awkward asking about money, but you deserve to know who’s charging what for your child’s adoption. You can tell a lot about an adoption professional by whether they’re willing to be open and honest about their fees. Adoption is a complicated process that requires lots of paperwork, which can make it expensive for adoptive parents.

Unfortunately, many licensed agencies and attorneys take advantage of families who want to adopt by charging unreasonably high fees for the work they do. Anyone who overcharges for their time, especially for adoption, is unethical and shouldn’t be involved with your child’s adoption. Here are some questions you should ask about fees:

• Do you charge adoptive parents a matching fee for helping them find a child to adopt?
• Do you offer any sort of refund to adoptive parents if you are unable to help them adopt?
• For agencies, are you a nonprofit or for-profit adoption agency?
• For attorneys, what fees do you charge to represent me in the adoption?  

Services You Should Expect

A reputable adoption professional should offer: 

• Referrals for options counseling 
• Support services
• Medical care referrals
• Legal representation
• Reasonable financial assistance (if needed and legally allowed)
• Open adoption agreement
• Counseling and support after adoption

Making Your Decision

Choose an adoption professional who:

• Is licensed as an agency or attorney
• Offers comprehensive services and support
• Encourages you to have your own lawyer 
• Is open about the fees they charge 
• Gives you the time you need to make decisions
• Supports open adoption agreements
• Offers post-adoption counseling and support

You have the right to work with an ethical, supportive adoption professional who prioritizes your needs and those of your child. Take your time in making this important decision. 

AdoptMatch connects you with trustworthy, licensed adoption professionals and their waiting adoptive families. 

If you have questions about adoption, please feel free to out to us via phone, text, or email.